Once Upon a Time, in a Land Far, Far Away, My Friends Went on Spring Break

For Spring Break this year, several of our friends

travelled to far away exotic locations.  

For example:

No, wait, that's me, peeling wallpaper.  I meant to show you this:

and this:

These are Ann's kids, seeing some cool stuff & hitting the beach in Texas.

  

And this - these are Heather's kids, kicking back in Florida.  She's probably sipping something tasty by the pool!  (No, no, I'm sure she is just drinking some iced tea & taking the family photo!)

Or even this, my very own co-blogger, who left me here (WITH SNOW FLURRIES), while she and her brood relaxed in the Bahamas.

But the one that takes the cake has to be my friend Rena, who wins for best-trip ever, because she went to France with her girls.  I've known you for eight+ years, Rena, and this is the biggest, most at-ease, joy-filled smile I've ever seen!  I don't care what it cost, I'm so glad you went.  You can always make more money, but you can never buy these memories with your girls.

 

My family, as you can tell from the wallpaper, did not travel to an exotic location this year.

But if we'd skipped the hours of torture trying to peel paper off of plaster walls from 1873, we would've missed these moments:

And they are priceless, even if we did have snow flurries...

Hip Mom's Interview with Marianne Ward

Marianne Ward has been married to Andrea Torri, for 12 years. They live in Rome, Italy and have three daughters, Vittoria (9), Cecilia (8) & Sofia (6).

(Please note that as the author of a book about kids & media I absolutely love her answer to "Who's your favorite TV or movie star?")

How do you enjoy spending time with your family? We love spending time on weekends and holidays on our farm in the Umbrian countryside, north of Rome. We cook, walk in the forest, garden, bike ride and make big plans for our piece of paradise.

What do you and your husband enjoy doing together? We enjoy exploring new places together—I took him and the family to India for the first time this last summer and we are all off to the Czech Republic in 2 weeks, cooking and just talking.

How do you spend your days? I get up at 0600 to walk the dog—this is my time when I speed walk with a girlfriend in a nearby historic park. Then back home by 0700 to make the lunches (pasta in the thermos and other things—remember my girls are ½ Italian, so PB&J doesn’t cut it), kids up by 0730 and off to school by 0815. We all go together and then my husband drops me off at the office. I work until about 1800 and then home to deal with the homework, finish dinner (the nanny usually starts or preps). We try to eat together at about 2000, though often Andrea comes home later. Then off to bed for the kids by 2100. And I read and then collapse by 2200—I am definitely not a night owl. (To convert the PM times, just subtract 1200--For example, 1800 means 6:00PM.)

Why do you do what you do? I do love my job as a United Nations Operations Officer. I love the way one is always learning about new countries, and trying to be as efficient as possible in ensuring humanitarian and development assistance to people who need it—it is incredibly satisfying. It still brings tears to my eyes to see some of the children in rural villages—even though after 16 years in this business I should be a hardened, jaded humanitarian aid worker. I love meeting new people, and having the privilege of understanding (as much as I can) other cultures. And I love working with people from all over the world, all with a fascinating story to tell.

What’s a job you think you might have enjoyed doing, if you had pursued a different path. Why? I think that I would have loved to run a toyshop or a bakery. I like to do things for people (like bake) and for people to be happy, and a toyshop is always a magical place (well maybe some more than others, but I think most parents know what I mean). And who knows, I might still do this. The opportunities are still endless, really.

What do you feel truly passionate about in life? My children. I live for them, and couldn’t imagine my life without them. When I travel, which is a lot lately—7 weeks in Tajikistan already this year, and Pakistan and Afghanistan in the works—I often feel almost physically sick when I am away. But skype definitely helps. I am the kids alarm clock when I am away, and I try to skype them when they get home from school, time differences and meetings permitting.

What is your favorite vacation spot? For now it is our farm, but the Amalfi coast is pretty good too.

Who’s your favorite movie or TV star? Difficult one, as we haven’t had a television for nearly 15 years.

How about your favorite movie? We recently really enjoyed Bend it Like Beckham and the Sound of Music as a family—it is a bit old, but I brought home a lot of videos from a recent trip to Pakistan, so we are catching up on all the movies we missed or never saw.

What are three to five books that you’ll always keep on your shelf?
1. My nice notebook with all of my to-do lists, as I can’t keep up with our busy life without it
2. Novels by Irving Stone—I love historically accurate novels, and his are just the best of the genre
3. House and design magazines—OK its not a book, but these for me are mind candy and help me relax, and make further plans for our homes in Rome and the stone farm house
4. The Economist—again not a book, but I don’t manage to read the paper every day, I listen to the radio and then get a bit of more in-depth commentary from the Economist. I have grown up with this news magazine and it is just the best. I can still remember the censored copies we received in Indonesia as a child, with all the articles on Indonesia carefully cut out!
5. Any book basically—the bedside tables in our family are always filled with books, any books.

What about favorite children’s books? Shel Silverstein poems, as they are so silly, and the Olivia books, because she is a pig with attitude. Most of my girlfriends know that my holiday gifts for their kids are books.

PC or Mac lover? Mac, definitely, They are so pretty, and the kids use them at school.

Laughter is, indeed, the best medicine

It's finally sunny! And anyone who waits this long for sunshine (and is still waiting for warmth) deserves a good laugh. A friend of mine shared this with me (on my new Facebook account). Thought you might enjoy it, too.

I Wish I Would Have Known...

Before I had kids, I read every book about birth and parenting I could get my hands on.  I knew that I would be tired, that life would never be the same, and that having a baby would change our family dynamic in an unalterable way. 

I knew these things, but I didn’t really know them.

I knew, for example, that I’d be tired but I didn’t know how hard being utterly exhausted would be.  When my first baby was new, I remember desperately wanting a little more sleep, and feeling incredibly, unforgivably selfish because of it.  I wish that someone had told me I might feel this way, and that it was okay.

I also knew that life would never be the same, but I had no idea what “not really the same” meant.  I didn’t understand that my world would shift so completely from a self-centered focus to a what’s-best-for-my-child focus.  I wish that someone would have shared that at times that shift would seem completely logical, and at others, it would be incredible difficult.

I knew that babies cry and toddlers throw tantrums and five-year olds test independence.  But I didn’t know that I’d be really good at handling some of these, and not so good at others.  I wish someone had told me that every phase is only that: a phase that will pass before you know it.

I knew that there would be more laundry.  And there is.

Everyone did tell me, of course, that time would fly.  But in the midst of diapers and baby food, I couldn’t really comprehend it.  Now there are no more diapers and no more high chairs.  Those cute overalls have been replaced by Hollister t-shirts and ripped up jeans.  I feel like the film is on fast-forward, and sometimes I can’t find the pause button.  I hope someone will help me figure out where it is.

-Kirsetin

Kirsetin wrote this post to participate in the Blog Blast on the Blog Exchange, which is sponsored this week by Discovery Health and their new series "Deliver Me."  

The Good Old Days

When my children were younger and I was knee deep in laundry (all those baby clothes!), I envied the mothers of older children whose days and nights weren’t filled with Cheerios and puzzles and Barney (oh yes, this was a few years back). When these mothers of older children said, “Oh, it gets harder, just you wait and see,” I thought they were full of it, or had had really easy babies, or were just lame. Harder? How can it possibly be harder than pretending to have endless patience while changing eight diapers every couple of hours in a sleep-deprived stupor. No way.

Well, way. Yep, sorry to say, those mothers were right. Oh, sure, I get a little more sleep now – lots more, actually. But I know that it’s a temporary luxury, which will come to a screeching halt in a few years when my boys hit high school. And, it’s also true that I don’t have to feed anyone from a spoon or help anyone in the bathroom anymore. There are also several hours in a day when my kids are at school, when, theoretically, I should have time to myself. But because I must be an “involved” parent, instead of relaxing at home with a great book, you will usually find me at a PTO meeting, or in computer class, or even running the class Valentine’s Day party, which is definitely not my forte.

But what those mothers knew, that I was simply in denial about, was this: when your kids get bigger, so do their problems. When my boys were three, “bully” was just some word in a book, an idea to talk about, not some actual kid on the playground who I want to string up by his toes and interrogate. When my boys were three, the pre-puberty hormones hadn’t kicked in, which – as far as I can tell – is the boy equivalent of that time of the month, except it lasts for about a year. Big fun, let me tell you. And when my boys were three, I didn’t worry at all whether we were making the right choices for his future. I mean, at three, they just want you to be with them. Isn’t that great?

I mean, I really miss those toddler years, even the baby laundry.

-Kirsetin

Happy Birthday to Me (almost)

I have a friend who is a smidge older than I am. At one point in our lives, this would have been a huge advantage for her:

Friend: Well, we have to play my way, because I am 9 and you are only 8.

Me: But I am almost 9. I will be nine in only one year. So then we will both be 9.

Friend: Nope. When you are 9, I will be 10. I am the oldest, and you have to listen to me.

Me: I don’t want to play. I’m going home.

But in the strange twist of fate we call aging, the tables have now turned.

Me: It’s my birthday soon. Didn’t you already have yours?

Friend: Ha, ha.

Me: But you did, right? Right? If I recall correctly, you were born before I was even conceived.

Friend: You’re not my friend anymore, really, you never have been. I’m going home.

Happy Birthday to both of us. She’s always been older, but also wiser and prettier. So, you know, it all works out in the end. Thank goodness for friends like her.

-Kirsetin